i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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