We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I supernannyed him into submission
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize