He is an equal opportunity slut.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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