Soap is not a condiment
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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