Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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