I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize