Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(209): View more from California

Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.

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(256): View more from Alabama

Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.

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(916): View more from California

i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable

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(210): View more from Texas

Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad

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(+61): View more from Australia

can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.

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(859): View more from Kentucky

I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it

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(936): View more from Texas

My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.

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