Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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