I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
