We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Are my feet made of real feet?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
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