Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry ohyeah1234 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(304): View more from West Virginia

remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?

Fav 22 9106 1402
share tweet
(410): View more from Maryland

it was a mass text i'm sorry

(603): View more from New Hampshire

do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?

Fav 18 4211 1442
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(514): View more from Quebec

Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?

(1-514): View more from Quebec

Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.

Fav 5 2842 672
share tweet
(919): View more from North Carolina

his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.

Fav 15 1264 4373
share tweet
(410): View more from Maryland

I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.

Fav 13 4608 1487
share tweet
(519): View more from Ontario

DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.

Fav 16 6524 1324
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?

Fav 35 2600 1147
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(+39): View more from

scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer

Fav 3 1157 601
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(404): View more from Georgia

I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF

Fav 0 74 41
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT