You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
You're a waste of cheezeits
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
