you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
