I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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