yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize