He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize