Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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