My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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