how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
