i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize
