Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
