Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
