wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
