The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
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