My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
