So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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