Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
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