You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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