If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I don't think brook has ever known best
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
