Do vagina's smell?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I stole a fireplace last night.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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