i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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