How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
