I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Let's get the cat blown out
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Randomize
