Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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