They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
babies were throwing up all over the place
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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