normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
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