my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Just cropdusted the office
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize