your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
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