I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
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