Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
