found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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