oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize