He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
