So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize