Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize