oh god the rape fog is back!
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
