so that wasnt chicken after all
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
