I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Randomize
