I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
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