would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
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