You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
you didnt know i had herpes?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
