Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
pop tarts are not kleenex
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
